Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
You're like the curious george of whores
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
