dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
