He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I will pee on everything he values.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
