He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Randomize