Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry savannahhh hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(208): View more from Idaho

We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever

Fav 30 9101 1151
share tweet
(514): View more from Quebec

You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.

Fav 8 5177 1092
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(360): View more from Washington

I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood

Fav 22 5560 1911
share tweet
(520): View more from Arizona

Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.

Fav 6 2917 1159
share tweet
(847): View more from Illinois

I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"

Fav 7 3309 1383
share tweet
(304): View more from West Virginia

There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.

Fav 8 1808 1704
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(608): View more from Wisconsin

I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.

Fav 2 2281 825
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(954): View more from Florida

Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"

Fav 21 1783 958
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(248): View more from Michigan

I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.

Fav 0 34 17
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT