how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
