Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
