At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
These tits shall not be calmed
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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