i don't want you to think of me as your TA
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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