hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Randomize
