i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
