wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
