I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
