Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(913): View more from Kansas

very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.

Fav 11 901 1301
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(973): View more from New Jersey

all we need is a web designer

(1-973): View more from New Jersey

and a bunch of prostitutes

Fav 19 2725 749
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(727): View more from Florida

just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer

Fav 16 4119 1413
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(206): View more from Washington

No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.

Fav 14 3792 1486
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(757): View more from Virginia

The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.

Fav 3 2595 1390
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(705): View more from Ontario

I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith

Fav 3 1175 984
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.

Fav 3 1581 927
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(813): View more from Florida

He called out my ex's name during sex.

(727): View more from Florida

Alex is a pretty common unisex name.

(813): View more from Florida

It was the same Alex. I asked.

Fav 1 17 71
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(343): View more from Ontario

there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer

Fav 0 22 28
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