I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
