We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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