I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize