I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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