There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
It's Friday. Sex?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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