I just made out with a guy for $7.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
