I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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