hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
