wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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