Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
