Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
