it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize