Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
