Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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