margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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