haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Randomize
