32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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