My sheets look like a crime scene.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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