She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
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