Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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