Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
