I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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