She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
