Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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