who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I don't deserve a penis
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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