I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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