I hate all girls vehemently.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
