I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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