New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
