Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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