# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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