Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
