I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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