You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize