i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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