i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
