Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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