maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Randomize
